Kings of the Road

When I lived in Aix-en-Provence, France, during my senior year of college, I wrote my friend Aubrey a letter. In this letter I included a list of everything I loved about France. To make it fair, I also included things I missed about the United States and things that I hated about France.

I think about this list often, especially when I dream about moving to an exotic, far-away land. I would love to move back to Europe–not forever, just for a year or two, or three.

I also think about this list when I meet or talk to people that just can’t deal with change, or trying new things, or anything out of their climate-controlled little boxed-in lives. I would fall into a serious depression if I couldn’t travel or try new things. It’s like some sort of syndrome, or a little bug inside me that makes me wander, makes me crazy with routine, makes me eat grasshopper tacos and makes me not want to go back the same way I came.

Thank god I had the foresight to photocopy this list before I sent it to Aubrey, because I JUST KNEW that one day I would want to type up this list and put it on my blog. (And yes, I had heard of blogs in 2000. Of course. Duh. I was so forward thinking and technical at the time, especially with how I had to SHARE AN EMAIL ADDRESS WITH 2 OTHER PEOPLE when I lived there.) And I think it’s interesting to see how things have changed in the past seven years (see number four, for instance). So here’s the list, with just a tiny bit of editing.

Everything I love about France:

1. Bakeries everywhere-fresh, yummy bread and enough awesome desserts to make you really fat.
2. Kinder eggs.
3. Cute dogs everywhere-stores, streets, restaurants…
4. Bars are open until 7 a.m. (um, I went out a bit more then. I’m on my way to work at 7 a.m. these days.)
5. Cheesy pickup lines sound more romantic in French.
6. The TV Commercials-they are hilarious. (Case in point-only in France would the Commission for Milk and Dairy Products make a commercial promoting milk that is sexier than any Madonna video. A girl eating cheese, glancing longingly at a gorgeous man, and oops! white milk dribbled on her chin. They make out, eat cheese and be sexy.)
7. The men are mostly beautiful.
8. The women are not. (sorry French women, but I guess that’s what I thought then.)
9. Fresh produce markets every day.
10. Little specialty stores-like for meat, for cheese, for tea, for salmon, for hats, etc.
11. People drive like maniacs and all the cars are tiny. And stick shifts.
12. The roads are narrow and confusing and cobblestone.
13. Red roofs.
14. They all take 2 hours off to eat lunch.
15. The garbage men come everyday. And they’re cool mo’fos. (note from present me: actually, I thought they were so cool, I would throw them beers from the second-story window. And they would give me treasures they found in trash. On one of my last nights in France, I actually invited the garbage men up to the apartment and we had a little farewell party. I’m not joking.)
16. French money is just prettier.
17. The coffee is ten times better.
18. Cafes. They’re everywhere. And men have no problem sitting at a cafe, even on a Friday night, discussing whatever it is men discuss together. Never would that happen in the United States. (well, I don’t know about that, or why I wrote that…I guess men in Indiana, where I went to college, weren’t big into cafes.)
19. Men on the street notice you when you want to be noticed. (well, I was 21…)
20. Wine. Is. Cheap.
21. French children are adorable.
22. The ATM machine gives you your card back before the money. Smart.
23. People eat dinner around 8 or 9 pm.
24. The shoes. The clothes.
25. I can walk virtually anywhere in my town. The grocery store is 2 seconds from my apartment.
26. I have a buzzer intercom!
27. Olive oil abundance.
28. Hardly any school work, ever.
29. Classes only on Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays.
30. Bisous. (Instead of shaking hands, you “do the bisous”–kisses on the cheeks.)
31. There are no gang-banging low-riding mall trashers. Well, hardly any.
32. Warm baguettes.
33. 20 franc pieces.
34. bon appetit, bonne journee, bonne soiree, bon voyage, bon cafe, bon examen, bonne chance.
35. Other cool countries are just a train ride away.
36. Preset menus.
37. There’s no law against liquor containers in public (=walking down street, beer in hand.) (not really sure why I thought that was so cool…I don’t think I ever walked down the street with a beer. I guess it was just the idea that I could if I wanted to.)
38. Opening the shutters in the morning. “Bonjour, Aix.”
39. Hi, it’s France.

God, it makes me miss France.