Whoa, Mama

  • Posted on January 29, 2008 at 9:25 pm

A little update on the pregnancy…

Everything is still going well! I don’t have gestational diabetes, nor am I anemic. Yay! I joked to the doctor that it must be all the hamburgers I’ve been eating, and she sternly said “that’s not the course of action I recommend for anemia.” KIDDING, Doc. Then she told me not to drink juice or soda, because they are loaded with calories. No problem, as I have a slight obsession with Pellegrino, the snob’s water. Screw soda. I drink about 4-5 liters of pellegrino a week.

The baby had a bit of a growth spurt, I think, because people have told me I look like I have “popped” this week. Um, people also told me this in November, in December, and the beginning of this month. How much can one person pop? Today at the dry cleaner, the cashier asked me when I was due, and when I told her I’m not due until April, she asked if I was having twins. I have 10 weeks to go lady, and I am not having twins! And I’m measuring perfectly normal! I think the baby is just hanging out high in my belly. I can feel arms and legs moving around under my belly button. I’m pretty sure she’s doing pilates in there. Or maybe she’s dancing…

I’ve also been having some strange dreams, but not the puppy-dog nurturing maternal dreams that the books and websites talk about. Nope, not so much. The other night, I dreamt that the baby came out at the doctor’s office. She could already talk and she also knew sign language. I played with her for a while, but I decided that she wasn’t quite done, so I put her back in. Oh my god, can you even imagine? I wonder what that means? Probably that I’m not quite ready! I need more time to get the nursery in order, and read all the books on how to be a mommy, and teach Larry how to change a diaper.

And because I’m sure you’re all dying to see this giant belly of mine, I’m sharing a picture:

30 Weeks!


A Small Rant

  • Posted on January 27, 2008 at 11:50 am

I hate knowing that I’m being taken advantage of, especially by a friend.

UPDATE: Not Quite As Cold

  • Posted on January 24, 2008 at 9:17 am

She returned my coat to the nail salon. THANK YOU. I was half-expecting there to be an apology note in the pocket, and a gift card to starbucks or a $20 bill, you know, for my troubles. But as my co-worker reminded me, I should be thankful just to have it back.

So Cold

  • Posted on January 23, 2008 at 11:23 am

Dear Person Who Took My Coat at Modern Nails in the Pentagon City Mall:

I hate you. That was my only maternity coat, and the only coat I own that fits over my baby belly. Now I have nothing. It is cold. You suck. I know it was probably a mistake, and you will hopefully soon realize that you have my Gap coat and not your Land’s End Coat. An easy mistake, because they are both red. But you did not look at the label when you picked it up, and you just grabbed the first red coat you saw. Mine was on top, yours was hidden under another coat.

RETURN MY COAT RIGHT NOW. I am very angry and very cold. And I do believe that Karma will get you if you don’t give me my coat back.



Quite an Improvement

  • Posted on January 21, 2008 at 6:38 pm

Did I mention that I moved? I’ve been super busy around here, but I unpacked the last box today and it’s really feeling like a home. We have almost everything organized and decorated except for Larry’s office/studio and the nursery. And we have a huge pile of boxes in our corner. (Anyone need some cardboard? Please? Anyone?) It’s been hard the last month and a half, packing, moving, unpacking, organizing and decorating, all with a little person growing inside me. But having an actual house makes it so rewarding and exciting.

I loooovvve my new house. I’m not going to post my new address on the internet for the whole world to see. That would be like inviting over 6 billion strangers to a party, or leaving a sign on the front door that says “rob me” when we go on vacation. duh.

Here are some pictures though–I will share that much with you.

New House

Living Room 1

Dining Room 1

Kitchen 3

Master Bedroom

Nursery--Under Construction

Even more pictures here on my flickr page.

Doing Good.

  • Posted on January 20, 2008 at 10:44 am

I had my 28-week appointment last Thursday, and everything is going just fine for both the baby and me. We’ve got a strong heart rate, normal blood pressure, average size, and not much to complain about. 11 1/2 weeks to go and so far, so good.

I had to take the standard gestational diabetes glucose test during the visit–they make you drink a sugary, syrupy orange drink and then take your blood an hour later. The drink wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be, especially after hearing horror stories from other pregnant women. The only bad part was that they couldn’t find a good vein to draw blood from. My veins like to hide, roll and curl. They did find one on my left arm, but it dried out after giving up only about 1 teaspoon of blood. Not enough. They ended up drawing blood from my hand. AND, my arm now looks like Jared Leto’s arm in Requiem for a Dream. You know, the one where he’s a heroin addict, and his arm gets so nasty and infected that they have to amputate it. My arm has a giant purple bruise, literally the size of a lime and so dark it looks like a tattoo. I had to cover it up at work for fear that my clients would think I was some sort of heroin addicted pregnant lady, it looks THAT BAD. I don’t blame the nurses though, because they apologized profusely and they felt really really bad. It doesn’t hurt. It just looks gross.

It’s worth it. I’ve been telling Larry that he’s getting a little Bethany:

Little Bethany in a Green Coat

Little Bethany Eating Cereal

How to Feel Like A Complete Jerk

  • Posted on January 15, 2008 at 9:45 pm

Yesterday I went to the grocery store after work and picked up, oh, a gazillion things. I went to checkout lane number five, and it looked just like every other checkout line. I unloaded all my items onto the cart and waited my turn. The cashier informed me as she began scanning my items that she was an express lane. Fifteen items or less. Uhhh…..I apologized profusely and looked for the sign that I clearly missed. You know how most grocery stores have “express lane” lit up right above the lane number? Well, this place did have a giant sign that said express lane, but it was a plain old sign hanging from the ceiling, and it just sort of blended in with the background.

I felt like a total jerk. I just stood there, eyes downcast, avoiding the stares of the people in line behind me. So glad that the cashier was speedy and had all the produce SKUs memorized. And to get just maybe a little sympathy, I opened my coat a little so people could see my growing pregnant belly, and take pity on me. It may have worked, because no one said anything mean or threw any rotten tomatoes at me.